– This is for everybody in the room. Look to your left.
– Yeah. – Now look to your right.
– Yeah. Up to the shoulder.
– 100% of those people have had their arms in your (beep). – Up to the shoulder, honey. I don’t wanna see you, I don’t wanna hear you, I
wanna feel that shoulder. – Hi, I’m Trixie Mattel.
– And I’m Katya. – And we’re “Queens Who Like to Watch.” – Today we’re watching a big old nasty movie about ice skating. – What are we watching? – Today we’re watching a
series called “Spinning Out.” – Woo. (dramatic violin music) – Okay now folks, listen,
there’s a lot of spoilers in our commentary and
be aware that there are a lot of twists and turns in this series. So, if you haven’t seen it– – Who is watching this and being mad that you got something spoiled for you, knowing what this (beep) is? It’s like a skating drama
series about two sisters, one of whom gets injured in the head. – [Katya] Yeah. – Which is why I know
I’m gonna love this show. – Yeah.
– Rail-thin women competing with I guess themselves. I don’t know.
– Yeah. – Finally.
(Katya laughs) Something I can relate to. It’s also a great title. “How have you been?” “Spinning Out.”
– “Spinning Out,” yeah. – Can you see my butt?
– Yes. – Okay. – Do you ice skate? – When I was a kid but like
we skated on like real lakes. So I don’t know how safe
that is, thinking back. – You know what my dream job
was like from five to 10? Zamboni driver.
– You’re lying. – Smoking Zamboni driver with two legs up. You know what I mean? – “Stay off the ice, kids.”
(Katya laughs) Roll the clip. Oh, snow.
– She’s got dandruff. Is it a Head & Shoulders ad? – Do you ever jog in the snow? Where are her earmuffs? – I betcha this is gonna pan
down and she has the skates on. (Katya laughing) You hear that?
– Roller skates. (announcer blaring) – [Trixie] Ice skating is drag if we could actually do anything. – Yeah. – A little more makeup though I think. (classical violin music) That’s the actress, right? Wow. – Oh wow, okay. (thudding) Ooh, ooh. – You know what, though? If you’re gonna fall,
you never looked better. Brain injury but she is a
little bit like (soft moan). You know?
– Yeah, she’s glamorous. – I’d be a little less poised,
I’d be like tongue out. – But you know what, though? In real life, the Zamboni would just pick her right off the ice. – See her as a piece of
debris and be like “Got it.” (imitates engine rumbling) They just break. First thing in the morning–
– She came out the shower with nylons? – How are my wonderful girls this morning? – She is 25 and her daughters are 23. She’s 25.
– What is she from? – She’s from “Mad Men.” – Oh. – Betty Draper. – [Trixie] I always wanted
like a young, hot, slutty mom. – Eat it.
– She just stuffed an egg into her mouth.
– I love that. – Because I overheard
Nancy talking to the moms yesterday and they said
you’re still rapping. – She said “I have
homeroom right next to you” because I am also a teen. (Katya laughing) – You know Emily cheats her triple toe. She’s fat.
– Fat-shaming. – I need Liz there. – Well I’m sorry but I just can’t afford to pay for both
their coaching anymore. – She’s like you’re not gonna aspire to anything greater ’cause
you have a head injury, so I’m not gonna pay for your coaching. – Oh, so she’s gonna–
– Honestly, I kinda see it. – The lame horse, okay. Who’s your favorite ice skater? I like Oksana Baiul. – Oh, Russian lady? – Ukrainian and she got in a drunk driving accident after she won her gold. (tongue clicking) – Honestly you have a gold, who cares? – Yeah (groans), time to hang it up. – If I got a gold medal in the Olympics, you better know I drive home drunk. (Katya laughing) I did Jimmy Kimmel with Shaun White, who I believe has four Olympic medals. – Is that the Carrot Top-lookin’ fella? – Yeah, the snowboarder.
– Uh-huh. – He said “(beep) your Drag Race crown, “I have four gold medals, yeah.” – But it’s snowboarding, it’s not real– – It’s not real.
– Real sports. – Ooh, you stood on a tongue
depressor in the winter. Maybe it’s like a balance thing
if it’s a head injury, huh? Yeah, a drag for her. – I think she’s gotta overcome her fear. – Oh, you think it’s mostly
just like psychological? – I think it’s psychological. – Go on, get out there. – [Trixie] Skate faster and
jump in front of her, please. – [Katya] Yeah. – Sorry, fatty. What a (beep).
– Yeah, total (beep). – You’re not competing there. – You weren’t even
gonna try, you never do. – [Trixie] “Sorry, I’m younger “and I don’t have a head injury.” (screaming) – [Male Coach] Holy (beep),
it went through her foot. (pained groaning) – [Trixie] No, no, no, no, no. – That’s disgusting.
– No, no, no, no, no. – It went through her foot.
– Yank it out. Is this real, can this
happen, she stabbed her foot? – She stabbed her foot
with the thing, yeah. – Who is ice skating? Take an Uber. (Katya laughing) That’s not sustainable. – God, poor Natalie. – [Katya] 17 year old mother. – Maybe she’s like pusher mom because she was young, hot, got
pregnant too young mom. – And she’s living out her dreams vicariously through her
daughter in her trauma. – Ah, don’t worry Nance, Emily can’t jump high enough to get
that kind of injury. – That mom is fierce.
– Yeah. – “Don’t worry Nancy,
your daughter’s garbage.” (Katya laughing) – Stupid women. – [Katya] “Stupid women.” – You. You entering that conversation. Katya has entered the chat.
– Yeah. – Well, I’m just so happy that you agreed to come teach here, you’re
putting us back on the map. – [Katya] She’s putting her
(beep) in the wind right now. – What the (beep) does that mean? – She’s throwing it at him. – Let’s talk soon, Carol.
– Yeah. – Yeah (chuckling). (relaxed guitar music) Oh God, what is she doing
in secret, is it pills? – Oh she’s, yeah, a pill popper. – Or no, oh, she’s
putting makeup on it, why? – If wearing full coverage foundation on your arms
makes you a lunatic, take me away. But I mean what’s the
professional prognosis? Unless you win major competitions in ice skating, you’re not making money. If you’re at the top 1% and you have an endorsement with
Capri Sun or something. You know, sports drinks.
– Capri Sun. – Capri Sun.
– Capri Sun. – Sunny Delight.
– Yeah. – Water.
– Jamba Juice. – [Trixie] Get in the zone,
Carol, get in the zone. She never leaves that spot. – What song would you dance to? – I was gonna ask you that.
– Yeah, yeah, yeah. – “Africa” by Toto. (Katya laughing) It’s a great song.
– Yeah, it is good. – Okay, I would do the
Weezer version of “Africa.” What would you do? – “Orinoco Flow” by Enya. (classical violin music) – [Trixie] Would you dress like Katya if you were a professional
female ice skater? – Oh, yes I would and my signature move would be a gliding back bend
where I grab the ankles, go all the way back, lick the ice. – So your feet on are on the ground and your face is touching the ice. – No, no, just the tongue. How about this? Tokyo, 2020, well that’s the
Summer Olympics but whatever. I’m going for my signature
move, everybody loves it. They wanna see me lick that ice. – Lick that ice, lick that ice. – It’s like a victory lap. – The real question is two
moves into her program, is she gonna lick the ice? – And guess what? Yes I do but just like
in “A Christmas Story,” tongue gets stuck on the ice. – And then you flip over.
– Flip over. – Tongue torn out. I love it when they put the leg up. – Here we go, you better bang that triple. Oh, she (beep) it up. – If I was her, I would go
up to that table and say “I have a head injury and
none of you could do this.” I said the same thing to RuPaul, “I have a head injury and
none of you can do this.” She’s PTSD’ed, it’s like when you’re at the club and that walk comes on. People are like “Is that blood?” I’m like (snorting), oh my god. Oh, she’s crying, come on. – [Katya] If you won a
gold medal, would you cry? – Are you kidding, I cry
from any sort of accolade. If they’ve mentioned
me on “Dlisted,” I cry. – [Katya] Oh no, oh. – What? – She’s a biter. – First of all, not be good.
– Chomp, comp, (beep). – So wait a minute, that’s
what she’s covering up? – She’s a biter, she bites herself. – She’s probably so triggered though because like she’s out with her friends, they’re like “Do you
wanna get a bite to eat?” She’s like “What? “No, I don’t bite, what?” At Trixie Mattel LLC, we do not think that people who self-injure and
are mentally ill are idiots. We do think that there are
smarter ways to handle duress. That is not it, girl, you need the arm. – She’s a biter.
– Yeah, she is. – She’s a biter. – This is a series, she’s not gonna resolve
this in episode one. She’s gonna be biting six episodes in. Arm will be gone, she’ll have
moved on to the left arm. – She’s gonna start biting other people. – Maybe she’s like, ooh, my stomach. (stomach rumbling) – Did you hear that, did you hear that? – Maybe I should bite
something, gimme your arm. – Yeah, you would. – Up.
– What time is it? – Did you not hear me? Get up. – [Trixie] (beep) you, 25 year old mom. – The mom is sort of an abuser. – Sort of? Big Black Swan energy. – Yeah, oh totally. – Mom. – Oh my god, not the clapping push-ups in the winter, wild side. Maybe if I had a mom who made me do push-ups, I wouldn’t be a 34 waist. (Katya chuckling) Worn the same size
pants since sixth grade. – You stopped taking your meds. – Leave me alone.
(slapping) – Bite her.
– She’ll bite ya. – You’re not healthy right now. – Should we call her nibbles?
– You’re hurting her. Do you hear me? (snorting) – Hey, Dasha wants us back in. – [Katya] Oh, gay, Johnny Weir. – Of course he’s gay. – It’s a pleasure meeting you. – [Trixie] Diva. (Katya laughing) – That’s like you. – That’s how you make an exit, bitch. – Yeah. – [Trixie] This got real gay, real quick. – I got your song for your short program. It’s Coldplay.
– Don’t (beep) on Coldplay. – I’m just kidding. No, I’m serious. – [Trixie] Javion skates on
his Instagram all the time. – I think that he does everything gay. – But that’s how gay all our friends are. – Yeah, they’re very gay. Also, everybody’s into fisting. – What? – Do you know that? – I didn’t get that from this. – I won’t take up too much of your time but since we’re with the biting, you’re gonna find yourself
at a dinner table, you’re gonna look around and realize that I’m the only one who hasn’t had a man’s arm up to the shoulder in my ass. I will say that the ice dancing pairs, very flamboyant, very (beep). – But it’s ice-skating. It’s like gay’s gay.
– It’s the gayest thing in the world but they’re like no, no, no. – It’s sucking dick. – Fisting.
– Anal sex. Fisting, skating. – Skating, yeah. – Good, now straighten it up. – [Trixie] You on a first date. (Katya laughing) – Oh, did he slash, she slashed him. – Oh my god. – Accidents happen, Katrina. – [Trixie] “I sentence you to 12 bites.” – “Yes, accidents happen,
now bite yourself.” (laughing) “In Soviet Russia, your arm bites you.” – I guess I’ll see you tomorrow. – [Trixie] What about him, you like him? – Not my type but I’d definitely smash it. – I love that you’re always like “I’m not attracted at all
but I would (beep) him.” It’s always you’re like “No, hate it but definitely suck him off.” – Well, he doesn’t
(beep) you with the face, he (beep) you with the arm. – [Trixie] Put your dirty pillows away. (Katya laughing) – It’s cold out there. – He said, “Are you into biting?” She said “Cha-ching.” (knocking) Oh look at her smoldering, smoldering. – Hey, is everything okay? – [Trixie] She said “I just
gotta dab a little age rewind “concealer on my arm and
then we can get started.” – Wait. – I’m sure. – I’m serious. Wow, you lifted an 80 pound woman. What are you gonna do next, carry the groceries in from the car? He smothers her with the pillow. – Shut up. What is this music? – Straight people are weird.
– Yeah. Do you play music when you do the sex? – I like to but then I think people get jokey, they think
I’m like being funny. – Why, what kind of music you play? – Well, I think a lot of gay guys, I think a lot of gay guys–
– The Benny Hill soundtrack. – They want like ♪ Do do, do do do, do do, do do do ♪ Like Vengaboys. If you’re not (beep) to
Vengaboys, are you (beep)? (Katya cackling) Vengaboys. – “Mambo No. 5.” – Yeah, “Mambo No. 5,”
“Tubthumping,” Chumbawamba. ♪ We’ll be singing ♪ Right when I nut. You drink your whiskey
drink, yes, for sure. Vitamin C, “Graduation.” That’s my (beep) list right there. – Put it on a loop, put it on a loop. I would like to do a love scene. – Really?
– Yes, I would. – What would you do, like?
– I wanna do you know the Nomi Malone
in the pool thing? I wanna do that in an elevator. – Where she’s like thrashing in a circle. – I wanna thrash up against four walls of the elevator and every floor it opens and people are like–
– “I’ll get the next one.” – Yeah. – And you push every
button in the elevator so it stops on every floor.
– Yes. – [Kat] Triple twist. – [Trixie] I don’t know
about her outfit though. What is this Ren Fair look? Oh my god, that is a thing people do? – [Justin] We pulled it off. – We’re going to Sectionals.
– You were amazing. – Let’s go have sectionals. I’m a homo-sectional. (hooting) – Oh–
– Congratulations. – My (beep) god. What in the (beep). – Did we switch to “Zoolander?” – [Katya] What kind of
a (beep) Wicked Witch of the West shoulder pad
wearing mother (beep). – This is like Mr. Gay Wisconsin 1997. – This is a men’s pageant.
– A men’s pageant. – This is a men’s pageant.
– Men’s pageant. – We’ll see you at Sectionals. – [Katya] He’s got a very high forehead. You’re a wizard, Harry. Oh, she likes him, she’s
trying to like dangle him. I used to do the same
thing with Dave Cooley in front of Atlantis, it was very sexual. – [Katya] What’s going on here? – [Trixie] She said “My
water broke, not now.” (deep relaxed violin music) Great gig for some of these actresses who have skating experience. – Yeah, I wish I had any
other kind of special talent. – I think you do, I think we
just don’t know what it is. Diva. – Yep, she’s got it. Oh yeah, come on, (gasping). On a lunge?
– What that art? No. – [Katya] Oh, she’s
pregnant, she’s pregnant. – Would you gag if a “Total Recall” baby came out of her stomach? (groaning) She probably got food poisoning
from Gelson’s like I did. (Katya laughing) And you’re gonna (beep)
yourself for two days. – My bracelet in your
hotel room last night. – The first guy I was with,
seven years older than me. My mom found out.
– Oh. – She wasn’t gonna send
my brother to jail. Okay, I might have
father issues, he is hot. – [Katya] Oh yeah. – You’re dating Jen? Is that why you weren’t
answering my texts? – [Trixie] That’s what happens
when you date a teenage girl. “I was texting you, you
weren’t texting me.” Let’s not date children. – I clearly misjudged this situation. – You’re (beep) a child, Beverly. – Wait, are you breaking up with me? – You need to keep your voice down. – [Trixie] No, louder. – You probably shouldn’t
tell anyone about us. – [Trixie] I’m a kid-(beep)
but you’re a slut. – [Katya] You’re a slut, she
should’ve bit his scrotum. – Not everyone gets a happy ending. – That’s me after every hook up. Not everybody gets a happy ending. (Trixie laughing) ♪ I’m in trouble ♪ – Oh my god, I would get
a little too juiced up before the performance and
she just out the window. – Flies into the judges.
– Bye. ♪ Oh no ♪ – [Katya] Wow, this is
like “Pitch Perfect” but instead of doing like a cappella, they’re doing something really cool. ♪ Trouble ♪ – Work, that is psycho, that is psycho. That is psycho.
– That’s fantastic. – [Trixie] Oh my god, of course
she has PTSD, who wouldn’t? – You asked if I meant it
when I said I loved you. – “I don’t.”
– I love you, Justin. – (beep) you. – Excuse me?
– Okay, been there. (Katya laughing) Dollywood, 2015. – “I love you.” “(beep) you.” I actually really like that because you go home with complete clarity. – And a sandwich. – And a sandwich.
(Katya laughing) – A half-sandwich, a quarter-pickle and a bag of barbecue chips. (Katya cackling) He’s cooked because he said it first and she didn’t reciprocate and now he’s like “No (beep).”
– Too late. – “I already started to pull
out of this garage here.” – Too late.
– Yeah. – Yeah, too late and if anybody
at home is wondering what to do if they’re in a one-sided
relationship, I’ll tell ya. So tell me very sincerely
that you love me. – Okay. Hold on, I’m gonna have to really think what that would be like. – Dig deep.
– To care for you. I love you. – Thanks. – That hurts, that’s worse, that’s worse. – We’ll try it again, try
it again, really, yeah. – Okay. I love you.
– Me too. – You love yourself too?
– Yeah. – That’s weirder too.
– That works, yeah. – Yeah.
– It’s also confusing. – Or “I love you,” I could see that. (Katya laughing) – All right, try it one more time. – Okay. I love you. – Oh yeah. (Trixie laughing) – Guess where I met the Kool-Aid man? At a mixer. (imitates retching) What if I went like this and just– (Katya laughing) The loudest, darkest fart
and it is blood, blood fart. A blood fart. Come on. A blood fart. Blood. – It’s not just about the
skating anymore for me. – What’s it about?
– It’s about trust. – Is this a bad time to tell you I’m gay? Honestly she found a
straight guy in skating. – Yeah, yeah. – I don’t care what he’s like. – [Katya] He’s like “I
have a confession to make. “I wear diapers for fun.” (beep) – Oh. See if he falls, she’s
like (chomping), gotcha. Listen, this show has a lot of things. It has eroticism, athleticism. – Yeah.
– Emotional journeys. The skating is cool.
– Yeah, yeah. It is very cool. – It’s some of the best
parts of the show I think. – Drama, drinking, self-mutilation,
self-discovery, yeah. – Stage moms.
– Stage moms. A lot of good things going on here. – Check it out now on
Netflix, “Spinning Out.” – “Spinning Out.” – Woo. – I like a triple sow cow.
– Is that a drink? – Yeah. – I’ll get a triple sow cow
with a Miller Light chaser. (classical violin music)